Skull Session: Quinn Ewers Doesn’t Talk to Other Coaches, Parker Fleming Wants More Return Touchdowns, and Thayer Munford Loves Skyline

Well, much to the displeasure of my lovely wife, I spent all day waiting for a teen to update me on his future plans only to have his mother inform us all at the end of the day that he wouldn’t be making his decision yet, after all.

I have no idea how I didn’t see that coming. That’s on me, honestly.

Word of the Day: Grandiose.

 FULLY COMMITTED. When Texas kicked MENSA Tom to the curb and hired Steve Sarkisian to replace him, there was a really weird consensus belief that five-star Ohio State quarterback commit Quinn Ewers might seriously consider a flip back to Texas – or that it could be a recruiting battle until signing day.

But that talk seems to have cooled down, probably because it wasn’t at all grounded in reality.

Following a throwing session that demonstrated why he is a can’t-miss football prospect, Ewers talked about a wide array of topics, including unsubstantiated rumors that he was wavering on his commitment.

“I haven’t heard a whole lot about that, but it’s funny that you say that,” Ewers told BuckeyeGrove. “My message is that I haven’t really talked to any other coaches besides, obviously, Coach Day, Coach Dennis and those guys. So, I’m pretty locked in with my decision.”

For my sanity’s sake, I’m extremely glad I’m not going to have to follow this drama to the finish line, because recent events have proven that it ain’t exactly fun when indecisive five-star teens directly affect my life.

Let’s just go ahead and get that signature in at 8:02 eastern time next December, Quinn, cool?

 NEED MORE HOUSE CALLS. I couldn’t tell you the last time Ohio State housed a kickoff, but new special teams coordinator Parker Fleming can. Turns out, it’s been over a decade, and he ain’t cool with that.

Unsolicited advice: just keep putting Jameson Williams back there and eventually, Ted Ginn Jr., Jr. is going to do some Ted Ginn Jr. stuff.

He gone

My favorite part of that gif is you can see the exact moment when Indiana’s entire defense realizes it just got left.

 SWEET 16. Folks, I’m happy to report that at least one Buckeye team has made it out of the first round of the NCAA Tournament.

Next up, No. 8 seed Florida’s going to get dumped in the Sweet 16 on Sunday.

 FOOD IS HIS FAVORITE. It was Thayer Munford’s turn to wear the mic at practice this week, and I’ve gotta say, he absolutely nailed the stereotype of a 300-pound offensive lineman talking about food.

If you ain’t hungry before watching this video, you will be.

« I’m a big man. I try everything. »

Also, I know what kind of ruckus this is about to cause in the comments section, but « I would eat it every day of the week if I could » is absolutely the correct take about Skyline Chili and I applaud Greg Studrawa for having the courage to say it over a hot mic.

 SONG OF THE DAY. « Diamonds and Guns » by Transplants.

 NOT STICKING TO SPORTS. I tried to recreate the original Four Loko to prepare for a summer of chaos… Two strangers gave birth on the same day in a place called Come By Chance and half a century later, their children made a shocking discovery… The mystery of the man who fell from the sky… A woman called animal control on a croissant… Audrey Hepburn was a spy for the Dutch Resistance during World War II… The scientific reason why we scream…